I Dreamed A Dream In Time Gone By

As a rule, I stay about a mile away from reality shows of any sort - I don't even get the train-wrecky sort of pleasure out of them most of the time, I just find them repellent and boring. I see no appeal, none at all, in watching people being selfish and dickish and vile toward other people in advance of some goal, or for manufactured conflict, or worst of all, just so we in audience get to laugh and feel superior.

But you should really, really go watch this video, because it is bloody amazing.

Susan Boyle on Britain's Got Talent (I Dreamed A Dream from Les Mis)

Never mind that she is an incredibly talented singer - because she unequivocably is - but to be the person that she is, and to know (and if she's a fan of the show she has to know) what everyone in that audience must have been thinking, that they were just waiting for her to make a fool of herself so they could laugh at the plump little middle-aged virginal cat-lady small-village woman with delusions of grandeur, and still to stand up there, unapologetically, and sing...

I wish I were half as brave as this woman is.

And no matter what happens after this - if she becomes a sensation, if she gets a record deal, if she goes back to her tiny town and gets a regular job and just sings in the pub on friday nights - for the rest of her life she will be able to look back and remember that she once stood on a stage and sang while thousands of people cheered and applauded wildly for her. She will always have that. She was not afraid to go after the one thing that she always dreamed of doing.

The Only Sure Things Are Death and Taxes

AHAHAHAHA I HATE TAX DAY FUCK.

In my defense, the fact that I found myself in the post office this afternoon filing for an extension on my taxes was not entirely, or even mostly my fault. I honestly don't know if Stanford bollocksed things up or if I am just hallucinating changing my address, but they sent some tax form that is apparently very necessary to complete my returns to the apartment. The one my mom hasn't lived at in almost a year. So, needless to say, we never got that form. Called the office about 3 weeks ago and requested it be resent to my dad's address, but as of today he still hadn't gotten it. So my taxes are not done (and neither are my financial aid forms).

Which is why I spent 30 minutes standing in line with all the other idiots at the post office who put off filing until the last minute too. SO MUCH HATE. Mostly because I am really insanely tired from staying up all not working on my paper, but because I was at the post office so long, I can't go to bed, because I have to get up in an hour and go to work. And as punch-drunk as I am right now, getting just an hour of sleep would probably be worse, because then I'd be all groggy and irritable and gaaaaaaah I HATE EVERYTHING.

ETA: I also just realized (WTF) that I haven't eaten any actual food today. I completely forgot by the time I got home that I had nothing but a bag of chips for lunch - I bought a sandwich, but I didn't realize til after that it was chicken salad, not just chicken, and I can't stand mayo. And of course I didn't eat breakfast. That might explain why I'm dizzy and my hands won't stop shaking! (well, that and the not sleeping in 30 hours, that probably doesn't help)