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Sometimes I Wonder About My Family
Jan. 28th, 2010 08:20 pm Life Lesson of the week, courtesy of my cousin: if you have a mandatory drug test coming up that you suspect you aren't going to pass, and your options are a) fail the drug test and spend a weekend in lock-up or b) try to cheat the test by drinking bleach, choose the option that DOESN'T INVOLVE DRINKING BLEACH.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY GENETICS.
(He's fine. Just dumb. So, so dumb. In fact, my family has a whole collection of Stories About Stupid Shit R Did, ranging in magnitude from promising to keep the candles in his room on paper plates for fire safety, to stopping in the middle of walking to someone's house to take a nap in a ditch, to the Ballad of Howie Nine-Toes. He is the kind of person who believes in learning things the hard way. Even if the hard way means drinking bleach.)
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY GENETICS.
(He's fine. Just dumb. So, so dumb. In fact, my family has a whole collection of Stories About Stupid Shit R Did, ranging in magnitude from promising to keep the candles in his room on paper plates for fire safety, to stopping in the middle of walking to someone's house to take a nap in a ditch, to the Ballad of Howie Nine-Toes. He is the kind of person who believes in learning things the hard way. Even if the hard way means drinking bleach.)